Ladies and.... no just Gentle... in fact just imaginiary bears who will read this in space.

You may have noticed a certain lack of a certain something recently. A certain lack of a certain type of update, on a certain blog, by a certain two certainly distracted people who were certain in their certainty than it was certainly a certain choice that certain activities were more important that certain others.

Or in the layman's terms we have been busy playing Skyrim. Which, is clearly awesome!!!

And so now, i search the depths of my soul for something to entertain that huge horde of bears that avidly follow our blog from space. But only thoughts of Skyrim enter my mind. And as the old saying goes, if you can't beat em, right a ballad about them.

So....

There once was a lady from Whiterun
Who was from whiterun
She said to some beggar
That she was from whiterun
cos no dirty words rhyme with whiterun so i can't do anything
violets are blue
Fridge.


YEAH?!?!?! PROBLEM!?!? Well I'm not the artist, nor has anything particularly funny happened that I can recount. So go and tend to your crops, or learn chemistry, or whatever you peasants do.

No seriously you guys rock, and we will start updating again with cartoons and random funny shit soon.

bye =)

It's just business!

You'll kinda have to open this one in a new window, or tab.

Damnit, I can't waste time here! What do you think I am, made of time? Do you think that I have hours of free time on my hands that I can just chuck in a pile and lather myself in? Well here's news for you, BUB, I don't! I've got business to do, Skyrim to play, and Blotholtogloth to summon! (Which, by the way, is no simple meagre feat!)

So like a Business-Man i need to keep things snappy, therefore I would like to hastily extend to you my sincerest thanks for dealing with the ridiculously large empty space of no updates. And I'd like to extend then my fist. Into your face. For wasting my time. HERE'S A COMIC I DREW ABOUT SKYRIM, YOU'LL READ IT AND LIKE IT AND THEN WAIT SOME MORE!!

*ahem*

Regular updates should resume in a week.

As Promised

Have fun =) And beware the ides of march.

 Look at him! Look at how awesome he is! But will the hero defeat him?

Anyway more cool stuff is coming soon when me and Flappy will be locked together for a week in the middle of a jungle volcano. Its business lingo, you wouldn't understand. So be ready!!! In the meantime go play Skyrim.

Oh fanbase...

Oh fanbase, sweet sweet fanbase, how we have missed your imaginary touch. How we have missed logging on to our stats board and staring exuberantly at our one view until we realize that in an egocentric rage one of us turned off our blocking cookies. As a reward for giving us such support here is another image war.

Choke on it.


Oh and the cherno is the epic cherno of youtube. Yeah.....
New one coming up, pip pip!

Exams and what not

Greetings esteemed fanbase! Firstly, I would like to extend my sincerest apologies for the lack of recent updates, both of image wars and Duckro-mancer. The reason for this, which I'm sure you'll find is a valid one, is because I have exams coming up soon as well as various other tasks that require my time and effort. Now, I'm sure you're thinking:

"Surely drawing one measly panel can't be to hard. Would it not be a simple matter of a 5 minute commitment?" Well my fellow, you think wrong. You see, although it does not look it, I do in fact put effort into my duckromancer drawings!

Strange though it seems, I actually Ctr+Z at leas 50 times per drawing! The reasons for this are that I do care for the comic, and that I am a perfectionist. So trying hard to meet my own expectations and produce a passable drawing, whilst also preparing for my upcoming exams is simply a stress that I would rather avoid. Regular updates should, however, resume on the 24th of November.

As consolation and to bridge the gap, I would like to offer you this lovingly and speedily drawn consolation picture to smooth things over. I hope you'll find that this consolation picture is better than the last, as the last one I realise contained some writing that I believe may have caused offence. As such, I have made sure that this one contains no offensive scripture whatsoever. Please, enjoy!

Poetry...

I really think that this artwork shows the depths of the human soul. I painted it on canvas using watercolours and my wet hair as a brush. I am really proud of all the ARTISTIC ELEMENTS i used i took particular care to use volume and depth in my work, as well as a careful attention to fine detail, like shadows and outlines. 
The message on the side reflects the fragility of the human condition and our expectation to excel and the disappointment when we don't. It shows our pain, and reveals our existence as just shadows flowing on a river of mediocrity.


Am I indie yet?

Willy 2

I decided to colour Willy in. Blogspot decided not to accept .PSD files. Everyone looses! :)

FUUU- That took too way too long...

Man that took ages for me to finish! I guess I was too busy partying hard! And by partying hard, I mean supervising my little sister's awesome birthday party. Who know that a pack of 15 or so 7 year olds were such an effective method of attack?

But what about the other 5 days you had to ask? What was I doing then? well YOU try and defeat the dinosaur king AND maintain a relatively awesome blog at the same time! IT'S NOT SO EASY HMM?

anywhoo, enjoy the next panel. And if you're smart, see if you can spot the subtle changes made to pages 2, 4, and 6 (the first being the title page.) Now if you'll excuse me, I have a raptor legion to defeat. FLAPPY SMASH!

Edit: Oh god the stress! The comic is now turning into a once every two days upload AT MOST. We'll still upload something every day though (image war, late night epic etc.) except weekends

Instead, you decide to give Duckmonology a shot

Gathering your raw will, you summon duck power from the abyss, drawing on your strength and feeling the fabric of reality tear and bend to your will.

Image War 3: Counters Counters Counters!

This was actually our first Image war, where the rules were instead of drawing two at a time, you draw one. First, I drew Sgt. Nomfaic to attack Sock, and then he countered him with brick candy, and then I countered with Butthead Mgee, and he countered with a distracting tophat shop etc etc.

In the end, we couldn't figure out who had the advantage (like every other image war) because of all the counters countering each other (like every other image war), so I ended up dividing by zero. Hooray for mutual destruction!

Late night epic 2: Willy

It's Willy, the thrusting farmer of Manchester! I can't exactly remeber how this guy was made, so... Sock! Add witty description here!

Hooray for autocratic leadership of blogs!!

now bow

Edit: sock's description...

It was a late misty night. And three dashingly handsome muscular men were standing outside in the drizzling rain. I seem to remember we were discussing the finer things in life, such as philosophy and hats, holding red wine and smoking sushi.

Then myself, the most dashingly handsome of all was like.
"A herpderpderpderp?"
and Flappy, whispered dramatically.
"A herpy derp."
Finall, our good friend daviods, uttered two fateful words.
"Herp derp."

and so....

This. [sic]

Frustration to the max extreme

Oh dudemanbro / dudettewomansis! today I experienced the fabled, dangerous & incredibly rare Frustration to the max extreme!

First, I misplaced the tablet pen which I received and a loan from school yesterday. I raged pretty hard & turned my room upside down looking for it, only to find it in plain sight on a table conveniently located in the most obvious place possible.

Next thing, I misplaced my Laptop! I freaked out before realizing that I'd left it in one of my classes. I had to traverse through the Raptor Swaps to retrieve it!

meanwhile, Sock is rolling around on the floor like a possesed son of a bitch. And i'm all like: "Hey man can you help me organize my stuff" and he's all like:

"OH GOD PLEASE HEL-nnnNRGI WILL HAvE YOUR SOOUUUULL!!"

And I'm all like: "Ok dude, Whatevs. (jeez!)"

Then, when I get home it turns out that I left the Image War and Late Night Epic II that I was going to upload tonight at school (also misplaced my Math homework). At that point, I whipped out the FFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

So, yeah, long story short: Too tired and angry to do a page tonight.

You should be satisfied with the 8 frame .GIF that I painstakingly animated, (That's like, 8 pages for the price of One!) and New image war uploaded by sock.

YOU SHOULD BE SATISFIIIED!

You greedy, greedy, non-existent fan base!

Anywhoo; sorry, love you guys, etcetera etcetera. Flappy out!

.::END OF TRANSMISSION::.

Image War 2 - Emo stuff VS Inanimate objects (And some cwazy dudes)

So once again, two armies met to battle. The war between images is growing more sophisticated. With themes emerging, and wars taking place on prepared battlefields, rather than the back of that politics handout that i still haven't read god dam it.

So, we give you another image war. Right side done by Lord Sock, Left by Admiral Flappy =) Whatever you do.... don't...


Once again, tell us who you think won

Poultrymorphing - the subtle art

Animooted GIF: Click to play!

For normal mages & wizards alike, the art of Polymorphing takes years of practice and dedication, because of the need to bend matter, the complex theory and mind bending practice, the tenacious precision and preposterous level of concentration required to successfully pull off but one simple change! But, due to your naturally low duck intelligence, you don't really give a duck about the practice and theory and bluh bluh. You figure that you can do it simply because you are told you can.

No comic toniiiight!

Sorry guys. Big day o' school with a big page to draw. Like, the type that I will put effort into. so, yeah.... sorry!

if it's any consolation, here's a picture of an apple with a hat on. I hope that this smooths things over, and expresses in full the level of sincerity of my apology!

(Actually though, I'm sorry. I shall strive to be more diligent in the future)

Gene (I think)

This is a character design for Gene, an antagonist to be later introduced into the Duckromancer series! This idea was thought up by sock. At least... I think it was! I drew this based on rough descriptions he gave me during one of his rage fuelled mad ramblings! I certainly hope this is an accurate interpretation, otherwise he'll have my hide!! And I don't want no more beatins! I CAINT TAKE NO MORE BEATINS!

Hooray For laziness!

And hooray for silly cut-aways infront of large coloured plains / voids! It saves me so much time copy+Pasting them onto the single background I've drawn! God I hate drawing backgrounds...

Wheew! Expect many, many more of these beautiful backgroundless, story progressingless pages. DUGONG AWAAAYYY!!!...

(P.s: Sock, you're fired!)

(P.p.s: Sock, you're re-hired and promoted to manager of demotions. Start by giving anyone on this team who isn't me a demotion)

(P.p.p.s: Sock, if you're reading this and have demoted yourself, you're abusing your power as Manager of demotions! If that is the case, you're hereby fired and stripped of your demoting privileges!)

(P.p.p.p.s: Sock, as the newly appointed manager of re-hirings, I DEMAND YOU RE-HIRE YOURSELF THIS INSTANT!)

Hey look at this great thing over here!

Hey there!! Are you looking for something to put on your wall? Fix your window? Solve your debt problems? Eat for breakfast? Or even use as a substitute for crack cocaine? Well this hand drawn picture of Sam won't do any of those things!!!

It's pretty neat though.

Hand drawn by the talented and totally not self-crediting Flappy (you know, the Dugong?)

Made Official (Gotta make things official. It's business. You wouldn't understand) By Sock!

And so Sam for short, Your quest has begun!

But before you start, you consider your skills. Duckromancers are adept in the field of Duckmonology the art of summoning fearsome and powerful farm-iliars to aid you in battle (pretty much just summoning Ducks), and are able to call on the power to Poultrymorph the world around them, changing inanimate objects, animals or even people... Into Ducks!!

Sorry!

I'm sorry this latest page took so long! I was having a party at someone's house, and then I got tired & lazy and Bluh!!

Anyway, from now on the Duckromancer will be a once a day upload, with the exception of weekends which may or may not have an upload. The loyalty to this schedule is also dependent on how I'm feeling (lazy lazy lazy)

anyway, i'm sorry, please enjoy etcetera etcetera bluh bluh

listening to the others almost always a terrible idea

Because The Others are almost always Douche-bags.

Late night epic =)

This is a perdy piccer that Flappy drew for meh on me birthday. Me and a few other peeps threw ideas at him and the talented bastard created this. Formed and created on a coke fueled all nighter we give you Charlie, The Robot Linkin Elf!!!!! (Dragan warrior man-dolphin)

Introducing Eggles!

That’s right! Your name is Eggles von Billsworth Quacktavian!!! Sam for short. You were born to poor farmer parents at the edge of the Quackital city in Ducktopia. You are an Eggspert in Backgammon, an Avid Reader of MS paint adventures, and are a world class Conessieur of Ethiopian food, like sushi. You have always dreamed to be one of the great mages, warriors, or duckplomats of the land. Ever since you heard the first whisper of the mystical thousand voices that speak to you, known only as The Others. You have on more than one occasion followed their advice.

And so...

with the blessing of the Duckrite Elders, you are ready to venture forth. Your mighty race, famous for their high Duckterity, proficiency in the Duck Magics, and somewhat appeasing Social Squills. You will emerge into the sun and quack their power from the rooftops. Who knows where your journey will take you? Certainly not you, you’re so stupid you don’t even know your own name, but your pretty sure it’s some kind of duck pun.

You swear you've never rolled a 6 on these

You really need to replace these dice.

Tools of the trade!

You have been sent on your way, carrying with you the precious tools you will need on your duckplomatic mission. Your trusty blade, Eggscalibur; Your inventory, the Satchel of Questionable Ethics; and your Dice of critical fail +1.

Gog damn it Jamie

How many people do you think will type in Skewedperceptions rather than SkewedperEceptions?!?! Answer me Boi! Oh well, I guess we'll have to make do. Mind you, this won't go un-punished! Maybe a banner edit is in order...

She's just so...

Mysterious....

Your Quest...

You have been chosen, as the mightiest champion, way mightier than Arbridge, to be sent of an epic mission of duckplomacy. A quest to form an alliance with one of the neighbouring kingdoms. Which isn’t necessary since your island is peaceful and self sustained and to no geographical significance or usefulness to any potential invaders. Nevertheless, due to your naturally low level of Duckrite intelligence, you will do anything you are told by your mighty King, his eggselency, Lord Peeking, and his Beautiful and Mysterious Duckchess.

God you hate Arbridge!!!

GOD YOU HATE ARBRIDGE!!

Welcome, hero!

Welcome to the fantastic land of Punthara. A land of magic, adventure, danger and ducks .You are a mystical Duckromancer, the most fearsome and respected warriors of your little known race, the mighty Duckrites. Throughout your life you have trained and have now become the most powerful champion of the duckrite race in the whole of the wide realms of Punthara! None of this means a lot as there are only three champions of the duckrite race, one of which is blind and eighty-seven, the other of which is some pipsqueak called Arbridge.

Duckromancer!

Introducing Duckromancer! That's Duckro-mancer not Duck romancer by the way...

Inspired largely by MS Paint Adventures, we embark on a silly adventure about magic, mystery and ducks. Actually, it's mostly ducks. Almost exclusively ducks. But you'll warm up to it, so strap in and get ready to ride the tidal wave of puns to come!

ps- In case you didn't know (I didn't), click on the image to enlarge it.

Image War 1 Buff Vs Anti Buff

I'm here to! The other guy with the face and the shirt. And i'm waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay taller than alex. Like seriously. Sooo much taller. I think, probably. I forget. But im still waaaaaaaaaaaay shorter.

And here comes pointless crap! That will make you all cry. An Image war!

In this issue, Mr Flappy owns with an army of mega buff stuff, while Sock frantically defends with Buff distractions such as steroids and dumbbells. Gotta not understand it! =)

The rules of an image war are simple. You draw a line down the middle of a blank page, then take turns drawing. BUUUUT you need to think of random crap to one up each other with, and have a morbid sense of humor. For example.... As well as at least one person who can draw well to distract from the shit drawings on the left side of the battle. Anyway, if you guys can figure out who won, then tell us cos we sure as hell can't.

From now on, all Image wars will be under the Image wars tab

Well hello there

yes, I see you down there! Don't hide, there's nothing to be afraid o-BOO! And that's what you get for letting your guard down. Let that be a lesson on staying on your toes when on this blog.

And when you're not on your toes, be on the edge of your seat awaiting the next exciting instalment of...

Duckromancer: A hero's tail!

Or maybe another heart pumping image war.

I suppose i'd better extend my formal greeting. My name is Alex, or as I prefer to be reffered to as, Flappy the Dugong (Flappy works fine.) I am the artist and co-writer for Duckromancer, and Opposing Warlord to Jamie (Sock) in the Image wars.

So come and enjoy (Speculated) our Blog. And, if you're feeling social, make sure to leave a comment for us to enj-BOO!

Stay on them' toes...

Welcome...

Long ago. Two daring  and dashingly handsome adventures, struck out on a quest to amuse themselves in a boring study period. On that day, something terrible and dark was created. A bunch of drawings of ducks, top hats, and buff things. Hence, we bring you stupid blue shit that will break your spirit and have a funnies =)
We hope....

 So enjoy! The amazing image wars... and the adventures of ducks!

=)